Thursday, January 8, 2009

What Makes YOU Mad?

I heard recently of a blogger
(no names, no packdrill)
who was freaking about the relatively few comments she got,
compared with some other bloggers.
***
I can relate.
I have times when I can be quite blase about it - after all,
I blog for me,
right?
***
DO I ?
***
Well, ja
but sometimes I have siff needy times
when it feels so bad if there is little response to a post.
Like a personal rejection
A girl-thing, I wonder.
Or just me?
***
It made me think -
(Everything "makes me think."
Its a very annoying trait of mine - it even
annoys me.
But I like it too)
***
This is what it made me think of:
***
If there is ONE THING that makes me madder than a snake,
its DH
tuning me out.
***
Do you know what I mean?
I am spilling over with something that is SO close to my heart;
baring my deepest soul,
and he answers with
something
like:
"I hear Kevin Pieterson has resigned as England's captain"
or
picks up the newspaper
or
starts flicking through the tv channels.
***
Or in the car,
when we are in the middle of a meaningful (to me only, obviously)conversation,
he suddenly leans forward to turn the radio on -
or worse,
UP!
***
I used to go ballistic
Now I just go quiet.
I feel more "omigosh, am I that boring?!"
than mad
But, don't get me wrong,
mad is still there.
***
Its an awful feeling to think that people might find you boring, isn't it?
Or that you are talking into thin air
***
Maybe thats part of the reason why getting comments
is such a big deal for us.
People out there are listening, are interested, even enough to join the conversation
And thats a GREAT feeling.
No wonder we thrive on stax of input
***
This is not meant to make everyone comment out of
guilt:
although personally
I'll take it, no matter what your motivation is.
***
*grin*
Of course,
anyone who feels like that needs to:
get a grip; grow up; stop being a girl; get a life taraa, taraa.
***
I'll try

14 comments:

Hayley said...

Oh Allie, you make me smile, you really do...and I am not commenting out of guilt :-)

Not sure if this makes you feel better but the husband does the same to me :-) I think he switches off the minute i open my mouth :-)

Rambler said...

I don't think we blog for ourselves. Our else we'd have a little journal next to our beds. This is a public platform, and it seems that the one's that last are the ones with response. Response means we have something worth talking about. I love response *grin*.

allie. said...

Yup Hayley, it does make me feel better - thanks!
And I hope that your husband reads this post AND your response and thinks of adjusting hi behaviour.
*grin*
To me its the oddest thing - your husband obviously adores you and I know mine does me, and yet, they do this!

Guys remain a mystery to me! But it sure keeps life innerestin.

And Rambler Man, ja - thats exactly the point -

Shayne said...

I know exactly how you feel. I get so mad when no one comments on what I think is a fairly interesting post. Is it about self-affirmation perhaps?

Be aware tho, if i'm not commenting on your posts it has little to do with what you wrote but more about whether or not i'm able to SIGN in to bliming blogger (now that i'm back in Amish Land).

I always find what you have to say witty and interesting.

Re the hubby, mine's the same. One word conversations are his fav - hmmmm, ok and yes dear are his top 3 responses

Anonymous said...

Have not been onto the blog checkout for ages as being in SA has kept us super busy. This post did make me smile and also made me think of how blessed I am to have the husband I do that when I have to get something off my mind he allows me to but then again, he knows that if he does not let me express myself there and then, he will more than likely get it in the neck so it's less painful to get the listening over with at that point so we are both happy whahahahaaaaaaaaa! I think it's given me balance, but probably scarred him but he has the personality to deal with my hormones thankfully!

He does however have his moments when the TV programme sidetracks him no end but now I stand infront of the screen and get it off my chest :)

love and hugs xx

Ordinarylife said...

I won't say I get mad if nobody comments, or even that it upsets me (too much) but I do really like it when I receive comments. Yes, it is probably a self affimation thing. What I wrote was read and brought a reaction. I see some blogs that are new and they recieve a lot of comments and I wonder what the difference is. Did they ask a question or is it just more interesting than mine.

Susan said...

Oh yes, ma'am I KNOW! I think it is called "being a woman" and "being validated". Comments make you feel validated...like someone cares what you're thinking. And, yes, we blog for ourselves...but we also blog to hopefully have an audience.

And as far as the hubby goes...it's a "GUY" thing I am so sure. I live with five of 'em, so trust me on this. They ARE from MARS and we ARE from VENUS.

:-) Susan

Susan said...

Oh yes, ma'am I KNOW! I think it is called "being a woman" and "being validated". Comments make you feel validated...like someone cares what you're thinking. And, yes, we blog for ourselves...but we also blog to hopefully have an audience.

And as far as the hubby goes...it's a "GUY" thing I am so sure. I live with five of 'em, so trust me on this. They ARE from MARS and we ARE from VENUS.

:-) Susan

Linda said...

I feel some of my posts are so vague that there's nothing anyone could comment about. But we do hope someone out there finds what we write interesting enough to comment.

I gave up trying to share inner thoughts with hubby years ago. My blog readers will hear more than him.

allie. said...

CHEZ!
How great to hear from you again!
Hope you have left enough time for Mel and me to have coffee with you before you go back?

Standing in front of the TV when you are being tuned out?
Now THERE is an idea.
Will try it.

Its a mystery - how some great posts get so little reaction and some arb ones, lots.
I think my biggest comment reaction was around a bad haircut!
I see Hayley had a huge reaction to a good haircut post recently.

Hair, people.
We need to write about HAIR!

Susan, seems to me we are like-minded people . .validation: now there's a good word for what we're looking for.

And Linda I hear you. I'm learning that the fact that our DH's loveus is no guarantee that they will be interested in the things that interest us.
Seems to just be that way.

Hayley said...

You are on to something Allie...we need more posts about hair!!!
Or maybe its the just a woman thing???
Damn and I cant go changing my hair anymore, so there goes my one good post for the next six months :-)

Jo said...

Well this one worked! I of course love comments too Allie and ditto a lot of what has been said above. I often dont comment because I havent put aside the time to comment 'wisely' especially on your blog so I dont bother.

allie. said...

Hey Jo

Forget "wise"!!!!

Just do "off the cuff" -
that doesn't need time to think and anyway, you are usually so funny in your remarks.

Anonymous said...

Allie, just read your reply. Will definately try my hardest to sneak a spot for a cuppa with Mel and yourself. My email is chezlee63@yahoo.com Send me your phone numbers and I'll give you a call. xx I'm watching out for HAIR posts now :)