Thursday, September 30, 2010

Pressing Pause Really

I have decided.
I am holding my breath and jumping in.
A while ago, I asked myself "What do I want?"
And came up with:

1. I want to know God deeper
2. I want to get fit.
3. I want to write things that satisfy me.

Arriving at knowing what I want wasn't easy.
As a mom and a wife, I have become accustomed to do what many moms/wives do - that is, do what we should; what others need; the sensible thing, or the practical thing.

Anyway - those 3 things are what I ended up with.

So I'm at the: "How do I move towards those aims?
Making decisions is the first essential; rather like clearing out your wardrobe of old useless clothes before you buy new ones.

1. The thing about knowing God - well, I'm not going into how I plan to implement pressing deeper into Christ except to say that, in a way, it twins with my dealing with No 3.
I'll say "Time management" and leave it at that.

2. I have joined a gym. Signed all the papers, paid my money and will meet my trainer tomorrow. Its done. And I am trusting for the persistence to keep at it.

3. It was a wake up call for me this morning when I observed my reaction to losing a 'follower'!
I was shocked.
That I could feel so rejected because some soul decided they didn't want to read my ramblings any more, is truly pathetic.
But I'm glad it happened.
Because I realised how much 'people pleasing' must have been going on in my own mind but under my radar.
And how can I try to write anything that truly satisfies my own heart while that is going on.

For now anyway, I am really pressing pause on "Allie Chilling"
She is officially on ice.
Maybe permanently but
At least until I can my head straight.

All you wonderful blogging people - I have loved journeying alongside you. Sharing so much. And I thank you for it.
Here's to a new day.


Simply-Mel said...

i hear you loud and clear. :-)

lucky me that I still get to talk to you every day...not every one is so lucky and you will be missed!

Lynette said...

Oh no! What will we do without you? I will have to phone, text and e-mail you more.


Terry said...

I totally understand Allie. Your relationship with God is the most important thing you have. Getting to know Him better requires time in His Word. You'll be in my prayers and I know He has good things in store for you as you draw nearer to Him.
Your Friend in Christ
Terry C

Meriel said...

x x x

Trix's Mix said...

Allie - one has to do what you have to do! But please come back soon!

Chez said...

Wonderful step forward. I'm not a blogger but I do spend alot of time on the internet. It's a necessary evil with my business but, I have spent and will be spending less time on FB for similar reasons so I can relate and understand.

All the best and I'm sure you'll feel tons better inside as well as outside.

Shayne said...

I hear you!

Good luck with the writing and gymming - ou will be missed xx

Kirsty said...

ah no!! But i totally hear you, and understand!
You will be missed x-x
Farewell, my friend ;)

Joanne said...

I know you wont be gone for long ;) speak soon.

Ness at Drovers Run said...

I will miss your updates.

Linda said...

I very much understand this Allie. I've struggled with this the whole time of been blogging - that struggle to find balance. I know that you will reap eternal benefits from this.

emily freeman said...

I know this is an old-ish post - but I hope you have been able to keep at your goals this month :)

And for what it's worth, I get 'unsubscribed' notifications by the week, sometimes several a week. I chalk it up to a simple sifting through who my true audience is.

Naturally Carol said...

I just found you because of reading the comments on 31 days of grace. I am sorry you have decided to leave too, I have only just found you and I love your heart for God. I love reading peoples' life journeys and what is in their hearts. When I have read a heart felt post like yours or about grace it opens my heart to share myself a little more. I hope you are doing well in whatever you have chosen to do.